My name is Mark Petroff, but I'm not the Mark Petroff, MD, you are referring to. I'm an artist who also just happens to be a very exclusive celebrity psychic. My powers? If Tiger Woods had come to me, I could have told him to stay away from the ladies and keep his hands to himself. But, did he come to me? No. Did he listen? No. Consequently, we now have Tiger Woods, a golfing "legend, " who has basically ruined his career, all because he didn't come to me, Mark Petroff, artist, snob and celebrity psychic and ask for my exclusive and free advice.
If you had come to me, Mark Petroff, artist, snob and exclusive celebrity psychic, I could have told you to stay away from Dr. Mark Petroff, the plastic surgeon. I foresaw that you would have complications from your surgeries and would have advised you to avoid surgery and simply breathe deeply and be grateful for the body and face that the Great Designer gave you. I would have advised you to be grateful for the many blessings in your life and I would have advised you to live your life through the joy of being of service to others and I would have advised you to speak the truth and not be attached to the outcome. I could have saved you $14, 000.00.
So, now, since I am a good Mark Petroff, not a bad Mark Petroff, I will give you a priceless bit of advice that you must practice every day from now on, even if you are not a cowboy:
Shoot low, they're riding shetlands.